It's not time to make a change, just relax, take it easy

Zeke recently asked me, "Mom, is it OK if I sleep by myself?"

My children have been crawling into my bed since they were babies. Sometimes I have gone through periods of proclaiming "EVERYBODY SLEEPS IN THEIR OWN BED!!"

It never sticks. They are warm and snuggly and sweet. They argue about who gets to sleep next to me. They reach their hands out in the morning to touch my cheek and say, "I love you, Mom."

I'll take it as long as I can get it.

But Zeke is starting to pull away. He'll be 11 in a few months, and he is exhibiting early signs of pre-teen-ish behavior. Spending all hours talking to his friends. Preferring to hang out with them on weekends. Holing up by himself in different parts of the house, away from Josie and me. Being churlish to me and his sister.

"Ugh, he's such a dick!" Josie will exclaim.

"I know," I'll say. "Older brothers can be jerks."

He's noticing girls, and they're noticing him. Sometimes I look at him and am struck by how handsome he is. I do my best to hammer home the importance of treating girls - and himself - with kindness and respect. His looks would make it easy for him not to.

Of course I understand that this separation process is normal. I try to give him space. When he's acting like a asshole pre-teen, I make every effort to not take the bait, and usually I succeed. It diffuses the conflict and his sweet self eventually reemerges and comes back to me.

Tomorrow is the start of the kids' two-week summer stint with Jason, followed by our two week trip to the Outer Banks. I will be using that solo time to set the kids up in their own bedrooms. They have shared a room since Josie was born, but we have reached That Time. They need their own space.

The bummer is that I'm losing our playroom/workout room setup, but the little alcove off my bedroom that I use as an office - which has never actually had much use as an office - will become my home gym. It'll be fine.

I told Zeke that of course he could sleep in his own bed.

So now, most nights he goes to sleep in his own bed.

But most mornings, he still wakes up in mine.