A few weeks ago, Jon Stewart did a piece mocking the media's reaction to a J. Crew catalog that featured a mom having a nice moment with her 5 year old son, who happened to have his toes painted pink. In response to the outcry about confusing gender roles and other bullshit like that, Jon made an excellent point: "Do you know how long a weekend is with children?? Everybody gets bored. You will do anything to fill the time. 'You want to paint your toenails, honey? Sure, let's do it.'"
Truer words were never spoken.
So Sunday we got up and it was a beautiful day, so we went to the zoo. Which is fun, but it involves me either pulling the kids around in the wagon or chasing them around when they decide to climb out of the wagon and sprint off in different directions. But I managed to keep them in my line of sight, and for 3 hours we walked around and looked at the lions and giraffes and tigers and fish and elephants and hippos and gorillas. We even got to see the baby orangutan, who is insanely cute. And we rode the train. And the carousel. And Zeke used the potty 3 times. By noon they were tired and starting to melt down, so I had the pleasure of pulling two crying children through the zoo on my way back to the parking lot, absorbing the looks of pity and "Jesus, I'm glad those aren't my kids" that you tend to get when your kids are acting their age in public.
The afternoon was spent napping and watching Dora, then we went to the park for a couple of hours to play. The thing about taking both of them to the park when I'm the only one watching them is that I have to go back and forth between the two of them because they can't do the same things. And because Zeke is older and more physically able to play safely on the gym equipment, I tend to stick with Josie more. She has J's attitude towards physical challenges -- bring 'em on, and the consequences be damned. Leading to me standing next to Josie as she climbs all over equipment made for kids 3 times her size while Zeke sprints off to the other side of the playground by himself. Then I get the nervous glances from the other parents, who are saying with their eyes, "aren't you going to go get him? Aren't you going to hover over him every moment of his life? WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU???"
I just smile and yell, "Zekey, don't go too far off!" And we managed to make it out of the playground and to the ice cream store without anyone dead or maimed.
We had ice cream. We went home and watched Nemo for the 70 billionth time. The kids had a bath and splashed water all over the place. I painted Zeke's toenails blue. We read some books and went to bed.
I didn't get breakfast in bed. I didn't get to leave and get a massage.
But I filled the time.
It sounds like a lovely, if tiring, day. A belated happy mother's day to you!
ReplyDeleteAnd thank you for putting up the John Stewart clip -- I had seen the ad but didn't know about all the fuss. And oh he is just so funny and smart. Glad to realize he's a parent!
I call it managing from a distance in the play ground...do it all the time when I'm at the park for soccer practice with Ryan and Alex and Cate wants to play in the sand box. I know the looks you got!
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