Halfway there?

I'm 41 today. 

Which seems old.  I look back on past birthdays, when the prospect of being in my 40s seemed so remote.  Turning 21 with my college girlies and celebrating in Old Town Alexandria.  The surprise party my roomies threw for me when I turned 25.  The big party I threw when I turned 30, when I played the banjo and sang with my bluegrass buddies, and I drank too much so Cameron and Trey had to put me to bed.  They were thoughtful enough to blow out all the candles so the house wouldn't burn down. Turning 34 in Costa Rica with J (the UTI trip), when he organized a little party for me at the surf camp, and managed to find some lady in Tamarindo to make a cake. 

I've celebrated a lot of birthdays.

Honestly, I don't feel very old.  Physically I feel the same as always, strong and agile, but with an aching back.  But my back has ached since I was 14, so that's nothing new.  I can ski or hike or bike and I don't feel creaky the next day. 

I have to admit that mentally, I feel tired.  Life is exhausting these days.  Occasionally I get a few hours of alone time to recharge my batteries, but most days are spent careening from task to task, trying to keep my head above water.  Work is great, kids are great, all is well, but I need. more. time.  Time to clean, time to get organized, time to spend with my husband, time to spend individually with each kid, time to myself.

If my genetics hold up and I don't get hit by a bus or something, I still have plenty of years ahead of me.  My Grandma Anne is 93.  Ruth lived to be 87.  Leo lived to be 93.  My great-grandpa Julius lived to be 102.  Great-grandparents Alex and Sadie lived well into their 80s.  So I'm probably not even half-way done with my life yet. 

Which I guess is a good thing.  Life is hard, but it's better than the alternative, right?

I want to give a shout-out to my peeps who share my birthday.  First, my friend David (married to my good buddy Michele), is truly one of the most benevolent souls I know.  He also happens to possess a wonderfully dry and wicked sense of humor.  David, I wish you a happy birthday and a happy year -- here's hoping 2011 shapes up to be far, far better than 2010 was.  Love you.

My friend Nicole went to middle school and high school with me in Israel.  Have a wonderful day, Nicole, and I hope to see you again in the future, maybe at the next AIS reunion.

My friend Russ (whose birthday was yesterday, but I still count him as a birthday buddy) is a close friend from high school in India.  Here's to making another reunion happen this year in Costa Rica.  I volunteer free surf lessons from J for anyone who wants them. 

Zeke's teacher, Antoinette, also has a birthday today.  Have a wonderful day, Miss Anty, and thank you for taking such great care of my child.

And of course, my friend Kristin, who left us way too early.  RIP, my friend.

So, to everyone, have a great birthday, have a great year, and let's do our best to have a great life. 

Love to all.