Thursday, February 14, 2013

Dodged a bullet

In spite of the fact that I am an unabashed and, indeed, enthusiastic user of foul language (is there any greater word, with more versatility and character, than "motherfucker"?), the only swear word my children have ever heard me say is "damn it."  I also throw "Jesus Christ" around quite a bit, because it just rolls off the tongue so easily during moments of exasperation.

Occasionally, Zeke will say "dammit" just to see what the effect is -- I always reprimand him and tell him it's not a nice word to say.  Last week, we were at a professional lacrosse game and Josie exclaimed, "look at all these people!  Jesus!"  Once I was able to contain my guffaws, I told her that she shouldn't say that.  Seeing me laugh, she then proceeded to repeat it ad nauseum.

Knowing that they are little sponges, and that they love being cheeky,* I'm very careful to hold my tongue around them.  The few times I've messed up and said, "shit" or something similar, it was either out of their earshot or they weren't paying attention.

 This morning, I was pulling out of the driveway to take them to school.  We live on a somewhat busy street (not a highway or major thoroughfare, but it is on the bus line and there are shops and restaurants on the next block), so sometimes getting a clear shot out takes a little while.  Plus there is a coffee shop across the street, so in addition to cars driving back and forth, people are constantly pulling in and out to park.

I saw an opening and pulled back.  But then I saw one guy backing out of the coffee shop parking lot, another pulling out of a space on the street, and another turn on to the road from one of the cross streets.  Everybody seemed hesitant and it was hard to tell who was doing what or going where, so I pulled back into the driveway and, without thinking, said, "what the fuck is everybody doing??"

Realizing what I had said, I was silent and braced myself for the onslaught of "fucks" from the back seat.

After a moment, Zeke said, "Mama, I think you mean, "what the heck, right?"


*It's like living with Beavis and Butthead.  I can't get changed without them giggling and saying, "I see your boobies! Heh heh...boobs!  Boobies!  Boobs!  Booty!  Heh heh heh."  


  1. "look at all these people! Jesus!" This has me laughing so hard.

    1. It was very, very funny. Jason was totally annoyed with me when I couldn't stop laughing in front of her.

  2. Ahhh yes, that moment where you're embarrassed that they said it, but totally proud that they used it in the right context. I can't contain the laughter either.