Monday, June 14, 2010

All children, all the time

Jason is slammed with work until the Vail project, on the verge of completion, is finished. The bosses are panicking over missed inspection deadlines and generally acting like whiny, bitchy little girls, meaning the crews are working long hours and being threatened with firing if they don't stay until late late late. On Saturday they asked if the guys would be willing to work on Sunday for regular (i.e., non-overtime) pay in exchange for a day off on Friday. I think the request was half-hearted because they know Jason is married to a lawyer, and that he thus knew that the request is totally illegal. So the bosses weren't too miffed when, upon Jason's legal advice, the guys told the bosses to go piss up a rope. Which meant that at least Jason could come home Saturday night and also have Sunday off.

All of these late nights and working-on-the-weekend schedules means I'm on child-care duty all the fucking time. And I love my children like crazy, I really do. They're funny and sweet and generally well-behaved and a pleasure to spend time with. But they're still really little and require constant supervision. I can plop them in front of Dora the Explorer for maybe 15 minutes while I go shower, and pray to Saint Jude that Zeke won't stick a screwdriver in the DVD player while trying to "fix" it or that Josie won't find a stray piece of cereal bar under the couch that she will put in her mouth and choke on. But the rest of the time I'm with them, and they're on me. Strapped to me via the Snugli, sitting on my lap, lying on me, crawling on me, jumping on me. I don't want to be Mean Scary Mommy, but it seriously took all that I had, numerous times over the past few days, to not just scream in Zeke's face, "STOP TOUCHING ME!! GET OFF OF ME!!"

It's gotten to the point that Jason can forget about getting laid until the Vail job is over, because there's only so much human contact I can take. But he's too tired, in any event, so I don't think he even cares. Ah, the joys of the modern American marriage...


  1. I'm sorry if it was an inappropriate response, but I totally laughed out loud reading this. Fingers crossed that things ease up soon!!

  2. Not inappropriate. I'd rather you be laughing than crying... ;)

  3. Anonymous2:16 PM

    I'm sorry for the German's beating the sh.. out off the Down Under Boys.
    PS: Although I have to admit it was fun to watch - if you sat on the right side of the table.

  4. No worries, Mirko. It was hard to get too into it when the Socceroos were so clearly outmatched and couldn't come close to even making it interesting. I turned the game off when it was 0-2. Jason didn't even watch -- he was more interested in his highlight/clip show of the Australian-rules football league.

  5. *laughing WHILE I give you a monstrous bear hug*

  6. Lilu - thanks babe! Back at ya.

  7. I can totally picture the stop touching me stop touching me stop touching me!!!

    You certainly do have all kids all the time.

    But soon you will be on vacation!

  8. I totally get where you're coming from and I only have 1 kid and a partner who's around. Some days, it's just too much toughing. I heard in the latest Tina Fey/Steve Carrell movie she's a mom who says her fantasy is to drink a soda by herself in a hotel room.

    Good luck Wendy. I hope it's over soon!

  9. Lisa - Vacation will be heavenly. My parents keep asking me if it's OK for them to plan activities with the kids (and presumably, without Jason or me), and I'm all, "plan away, folks!"

    Anne - that's so funny -- I actually did that a few months ago. I stayed at a hotel in town for a night, by myself. I read magazines and watched Jersey Shore reruns and slept in a bed by myself. It was wonderful.

  10. Glenn Brown2:12 PM

    I always enjoy your posts. You have such a gift for writing.

  11. Aw, thanks, Glenn! 'Preshate it.