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Thursday, January 21, 2010

TMI Thursday: Walt Disney causes gender confusion in a toddler

TMI Thursday

OK, folks, time for another TMI Thursday. Click the picture above to read more awesomely cringe-worthy TMIs courtesy of LiLu at LivitLuvit.com.

Zeke is increasingly interested in private parts. Both his own and other people's. He's had his hand in his junk pretty much since a) he discovered he had control over his hands and figured out how to grab things, and b) he discovered his penis.

But now, he's all interested in checking out everyone else's business, too.

"Baby's penis!" he'll say when I've got Josie on her changing table.

"No, Josie doesn't have a penis. She's a girl. She has a vagina." I decided early on I wasn't going to come up with some cutesy name for it.

"Baby's vagina!"

"Right."

Or I'll be getting dressed in the morning and trying to talk to him about how he needs to go find his socks or something. But if I'm standing there in my underwear, he's all mesmerized, staring at my groin, like he's trying to develop X-ray vision to see through my clothes.

I'll say, "Zeke. Zeke! I'm talking to you! Pay attention!" But he's a total fucking zombie, all engrossed by what's behind my Fruit of the Looms. Or he'll just point and say, "Mama's vagina!" And I'm all, "yeah, yeah, Mama has a vagina. Now go get your socks."

*sigh*

But at least in those situations, there's clarity about what to say.

The other day I was putting Zeke in his PJs while he was playing with a little Mickey Mouse stuffed animal. The doll has a pair of pants with a hole in the back where the mouse's tail pokes through.

"Tail," Zeke observed.

"Yes, that's his tail."

"And that's his bum-bum," he said, pointing to the mouse's butt.

"Yep."

He turned the mouse around and pulled down the doll's little pants. "Mouse's penis," he said, pointing between the doll's legs.

"No, actually, the mouse doesn't have a penis."

Zeke thought for a second. "Mouse's vagina!"

"No, well, actually, honey, the mouse doesn't have a vagina either. He doesn't have anything."

This was not a satisfactory answer. "Mouse's penis! Mouse's vagina!"

"Uhhhh...."

I have no idea what to say about this one. If anyone has any suggestions, I'm all (mouse) ears.

6 comments:

  1. Um. I have no suggestion for that one. But now I am totally imagining Mickey Mouse with a cartoon erection, which is just so disconcerting and wrong.

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  2. Ewwwww. I need to wash my brain now.

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  3. You could be the Enid Strict ("Church Lady") and tell him that Micky had a big one which fell off after years of abuse....

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  4. Well, at least he doesn't go out in public pointing out people's private areas.

    Now THAT would be embarrassing.

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  5. Michelle -- hee! But in all honesty, I don't want to discourage him from self-abuse, if that's what he's into (as long as he does it in private).

    Zan -- it's only a matter of time.

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Nu?