It's one of those rare days in Hawaii -- particularly on the side of Oahu we live on -- when it's rainy and crappy out. I've actually always loved rainy crappy days, so having the weather be perfect all the time isn't all it's cracked up to be. But right now it's thundering and lightening out, Zeke is dozing in his carseat on my desk, the dog is asleep at my feet, and I've got a mellow playlist going on iTunes. It's very peaceful.
It's been hard to find time to do anything not baby-related these days, thus the dearth of blog posts. Zeke is doing great -- at his 1month checkup he was 10 lbs 6 ozs and has grown an inch and a half. He's a solid little munchkin. He's starting to react to my facial expressions - I've gotten what looks like smiles, but I'm not sure. In any event, he's pretty damned cute.
In other news, we had a nice Thanksgiving with my brother Sam and his wife. I discovered that the key to a great turkey is to brine it. I also discovered, when we went for a hike, that not sleeping more than 2 hours at a stretch for a month is not conducive to cardiovascular strength. I practically coughed up a lung trying to walk up this hill. Also, we are getting the keys to our new house on Monday, and will move in the following weekend. It's going to be so great to be in our own place. We're going to get a Christmas tree - my first.
When I was about 5 or 6 months pregnant, I ordered some DVDs from Amazon. One was a childbirth class, and the other was called The Happiest Baby On The Block, and it showed techniques for calming a crying or fussing baby. We watched the childbirth DVD in preparation for labor, but stuck the other one in a drawer and forgot about it.
Until last night.
Zeke has had a rough couple of days. He has been very fussy, and I thought he had bad gas, and then thought he was sick with a cold because his nose sounded congested, so I took him to the pediatrician yesterday to have him looked at. Apparently, his belly is nice and soft, indicating no gas problems, and according to the doctor, his nose wasn't even stuffed up. So in addition to being unable to calm my child, I have become that mom that rushes off to the doctor like a ninny the minute the kid shows signs of having a hangnail. But I did discover he now weighs 10 pounds (as my father said, "great news! we've never had a Sumo wrestler in the family!")
Anyway. He was relatively calm all morning yesterday, but then at around 2pm started this cycle of hysterical crying for 20 minutes followed by 5 minutes of calm, then more hysterical crying, then maybe 10 minutes of sleep, then more hysterical crying, etc. Nothing worked. I walked with him, sang to him, tried giving him a bottle, tried giving him a pacifier, tried holding him up on my shoulder, tried cradling him on his side, tried putting him in the carseat, the bouncy seat, and the swing, and nothing would calm him down.
Finally, he seemed to settle down on my shoulder (doing that "huh-huh-huh" thing kids do when they've been crying forever and are trying to calm down -- so pathetic), and I remembered this DVD and decided to watch it. It's made by a pediatrician whose theory is that the first 3 months of life are essentially a fourth trimester of pregnancy, and the best way to soothe a baby and make him feel secure is to mimic the conditions the baby was used to in utero. Common sense, yes, but sometimes it takes someone showing you the obvious before you get clued in. So the techniques are, you swaddle the baby tightly, hold him on his side or stomach, "shush" loudly (or use some other form of white noise), gently jiggle the baby, and give him something to suck on. Jason got the tricks down right away, but it took me a little while to get the hang of the side/stomach position. But I tried again this morning when Zeke was fussing; I swaddled him tightly, put him on his side (carrying him like a football, with his cheek in my palm), shushed him, and jiggled him a little, and he literally went from crying hard to passed out cold in about 10 seconds. He is now asleep in his crib with my white noise machine on loud about 6 inches from his ear, happier than a pig in shit.
shhh...
Dr. Harvey Karp, if I could nominate you for a Nobel Prize, I would. I think you saved my life, or at least my sanity.
for reassuring me that I'm not a monster and that it's perfectly normal for me to not find taking care of a newborn to be particularly enjoyable. My days have a foggy sameness -- waking to the sound of crying, changing a diaper, giving a bottle, burping, saying "shhh" when he cries (which is alot -- poor monkey's got bad gas and I'm having a hard time getting rid of it), waiting for him to fall asleep, falling asleep myself, waking to the sound of crying, and on and on. I love the kid, but I'll be really happy when he starts daycare.
As anyone who knows me knows, I am a chronic insomniac. Haven't slept well for 10 or 11 years. I usually have no trouble falling asleep, but I'll wake up in the middle of the night and then not be able to fall asleep again until 4 or 5 in the morning. But I think I've finally figured out my issue. Apparently, my problem was that I had too much time to sleep. All of those uninterrupted hours during the night were too much for my system to handle. It was an embarrassment of riches. Because now that the time available to me for sleeping is so drastically limited -- I'm getting maybe 3-4 hours a night, in 1-2 hour increments -- I'm sleeping like a champ. No more waking up in the middle of the night, staring at the clock, unable to drift off again. So for all of you poor saps who can't seem to fall asleep or stay asleep, just set your alarm to go off every 3 hours or so, and then make yourself get out of bed and either rock in a chair or walk the halls for half hour to an hour at a time. You'll be nice and exhausted and will never have trouble sleeping again.
